Point of Ares: The Sorrows of Young Apollo
Oh, where do I begin? And when can I stop? Do not buy this
album. Do not even gaze directly at it. You may turn to stone. Try
to banish thoughts of it from your mind altogether. God knows I
intend to, and with the help of powerful sedatives perhaps I shall
Speaking of powerful sedatives, back to this album. It's mythology
rock--a whole album with songs about mythological or classical
characters. Sound bad? It gets worse. The music is awful, the
lyrics make me blush in embarrassment for their author. I shan't
subject you to them.
The title track, The Sorrows of Young Apollo, is unadulterated
tedium. The song Hypatia is empty pedantry plus tedium. Dionysus
makes me need a drink of something much stronger than wine--vodka
maybe, or hemlock. Pygmalion is painful. Apollo in Picardy is the
best song lyrically, in that it comprises only thre lines and is
therefore the least offencive. Leucothe sounds like something a
sorority girl wrote in a creative writing class I had once, only
without the part about oral sex. Miranda needs to be mirandized and
then locked away for a long time. Cassandra is a song that could
launch a thousand ships, far far away from the offending din.
Cyparissus mentions Orpheus but that still cannot save it. Asphodel
is something Brett Gurewitz might write if he ever got out of rehab
and had lots of electroshock and became really addled.
So yes, bad. Bad album.
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